1 00:00:24,019 --> 00:00:27,609 Oh, Gomez, this place looks dreadful. 2 00:00:29,329 --> 00:00:30,410 Good work, everyone. 3 00:00:34,909 --> 00:00:36,729 The Joneses will be here any minute! 4 00:00:37,310 --> 00:00:39,109 How do I look? Should I put on a more expensive suit? 5 00:00:40,170 --> 00:00:41,890 What about the house? Is it big enough? Should I build another wing? 6 00:00:43,500 --> 00:00:45,000 Should I restock the swamp with piranhas? 7 00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:52,270 Here we go again. Gomez, you promised. No more competing with Cousin Ramon. 8 00:00:52,789 --> 00:00:55,659 I'm getting tired of listening to Putrescent's boast whenever he wins. 9 00:00:56,060 --> 00:00:57,700 So Ramon beats me once in a while. 10 00:00:57,899 --> 00:01:00,679 Like when he beat you at musical electrical chairs last year. 11 00:01:00,979 --> 00:01:03,420 It was javelin catching the year before that. 12 00:01:03,460 --> 00:01:05,180 Didn't he learn to tie his shoes before you? 13 00:01:05,540 --> 00:01:07,620 Is he funnier than you? All right, all right. 14 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:09,400 All right, querida. 15 00:01:09,900 --> 00:01:12,700 For you, I promise, no more ruthless competing. 16 00:01:13,500 --> 00:01:15,439 Right after I win that first round of grenade tag. 17 00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:17,900 We've been practicing all week. Gomez, 18 00:01:17,900 --> 00:01:21,200 the only way to ensure Ramon doesn't beat you is if you stop competing. 19 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:22,500 But... No buts. 20 00:01:22,719 --> 00:01:23,810 Now put that grenade away. 21 00:01:24,450 --> 00:01:26,989 And make sure it's someplace the children can find it. 22 00:01:48,409 --> 00:01:53,459 The Addams Family, how you do The Addams Family Come into The Addams Family 23 00:01:56,730 --> 00:01:59,250 It's the Addams Family! 24 00:01:59,390 --> 00:02:04,640 Welcome to the Addams Family, going to the Addams Family, 25 00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:07,780 coming to the Addams Family now! 26 00:02:15,750 --> 00:02:22,900 You dress up a little Monday. It's so good to see you again. Morticia, 27 00:02:22,900 --> 00:02:26,360 you look like you haven't slept in weeks. You're too kind. 28 00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:29,090 I'm sure I only look like I haven't slept in days. 29 00:02:30,490 --> 00:02:34,319 Hello, Monday. Wednesday, I brought my new doll. 30 00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:35,590 Let's go play. 31 00:02:37,370 --> 00:02:39,889 Bravo! 32 00:02:39,990 --> 00:02:44,810 So good to see you. Not as good as it is to see you, Gomez. Oh, 33 00:02:44,810 --> 00:02:48,759 you are looking a little out of shape there, old man. Not at all, 34 00:02:48,759 --> 00:02:50,740 but I can't believe yours feels a little weak. 35 00:02:51,560 --> 00:03:02,909 Ooh, Patricia, I love what you've done with the foyer. Thank you. It's bellissimo. 36 00:03:03,310 --> 00:03:05,030 Tres, that is Italian. 37 00:03:05,050 --> 00:03:05,169 Sissi. 38 00:03:06,009 --> 00:03:07,490 You know what that does to me. 39 00:03:11,669 --> 00:03:15,849 Morticia, you know what it does to me when you speak French. 40 00:03:17,539 --> 00:03:19,080 Gomez, I didn't say a word. 41 00:04:33,629 --> 00:04:35,870 Have you done something different with your hair, Morticia? Oh, 42 00:04:35,870 --> 00:04:38,209 crude oil conditioner. You really must try it sometime. 43 00:04:38,470 --> 00:04:40,129 Dinner. 44 00:04:41,050 --> 00:04:42,649 First one there's the rotten egg! 45 00:04:53,209 --> 00:04:55,170 More of the bat wings, please, Angela. 46 00:04:55,649 --> 00:04:58,949 Coming right up. Me too, Mama. Who is? 47 00:04:59,410 --> 00:04:59,910 I'm hungry. 48 00:05:19,050 --> 00:05:21,170 And where is your abhorrent son, Piddly? 49 00:05:21,689 --> 00:05:23,470 Retention? Recovery room. 50 00:05:23,970 --> 00:05:27,759 County General. And there were no witnesses. 51 00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:31,180 I noticed Pugsy looks... healthy. 52 00:05:32,100 --> 00:05:34,490 I thought he'd be more fun for us to chase that way. 53 00:05:41,399 --> 00:05:43,180 I've only got one left. 54 00:06:03,079 --> 00:06:03,879 102 bat wings. 55 00:06:04,439 --> 00:06:05,879 That's got to be a world record. 56 00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:09,670 I'll look it up in this world record book that I just happen to have on my lap. 57 00:06:11,649 --> 00:06:16,350 Well, actually, the record is 103. How do you know? 58 00:06:18,490 --> 00:06:19,189 He holds it. 59 00:06:23,009 --> 00:06:28,069 Anyone have an antacid? 60 00:06:28,750 --> 00:06:33,860 I always find it helps my digestion if I do a few calisthenics after a big meal. 61 00:06:38,639 --> 00:06:40,779 A little after-dinner exercise never hurts. 62 00:06:41,079 --> 00:06:42,160 Then you're not doing it right. 63 00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:55,110 Nice form, but you didn't get very much height on your dismount. 64 00:07:05,769 --> 00:07:06,870 I can jump higher than you. 65 00:07:24,579 --> 00:07:28,019 Listen to our boys. Honestly, I don't know what gets into them. 66 00:07:28,639 --> 00:07:31,839 I told Gomez to stop competing with Ramon, but he just won't listen. 67 00:07:33,459 --> 00:07:36,319 Mother, can I sleep over tonight? 68 00:07:36,420 --> 00:07:38,379 If it's all right with cousin Leticia. 69 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:39,199 Of course. 70 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:41,250 I'll have Lurch set up the cart of nails. 71 00:07:42,579 --> 00:07:43,250 Excellent. 72 00:07:46,029 --> 00:07:48,329 Why can't our husbands behave more like children? 73 00:07:55,980 --> 00:07:58,459 I hurt my foot. I think I broke my leg. 74 00:07:58,839 --> 00:08:03,430 Gomez, you promised. No more silly competitions. Now apologize to Ramon. 75 00:08:04,110 --> 00:08:06,850 And Ramon, apologize to Gomez. 76 00:08:08,509 --> 00:08:10,300 I'm sorry. I'm even sorry. 77 00:08:18,610 --> 00:08:22,910 It was lovely seeing you again. Thank you so much for having us, Morticia. 78 00:08:22,930 --> 00:08:26,149 I'll have Lurch bring Monday home tomorrow afternoon. 79 00:08:26,170 --> 00:08:27,769 Don't bother. I'll come to get her. 80 00:08:30,290 --> 00:08:34,200 So, Gomez, what do you think of my new roadster? 81 00:08:36,230 --> 00:08:41,559 She does zero to 60 in six seconds. 82 00:08:44,340 --> 00:08:46,200 Well, ours can do it in five. 83 00:08:46,899 --> 00:08:48,120 With the emergency brake on! 84 00:08:50,659 --> 00:08:51,480 Is that so? 85 00:08:56,429 --> 00:08:57,629 Maybe we should have a race. 86 00:08:58,509 --> 00:08:59,490 Any time, any place. 87 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:03,100 Well then, I'll see you tomorrow afternoon. 88 00:09:03,779 --> 00:09:04,299 You're on! 89 00:09:10,029 --> 00:09:12,500 But darling, we don't know how to drive. Miller, is that? 90 00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:38,639 Oh, what an unpleasant surprise. 91 00:09:40,929 --> 00:09:46,350 Morticia, I just wanted to apologize for Ramon's behavior last night. Apologize? 92 00:09:46,549 --> 00:09:49,230 Oh, dear, putrescence, I should be the one who's apologizing. 93 00:09:49,549 --> 00:09:51,860 Gomez can be so immature sometimes. 94 00:09:53,019 --> 00:09:56,220 When he comes to be mature, Gomez can't hold a candle to my Ramon. 95 00:09:56,759 --> 00:09:59,139 Is this such a pathetic little baby? Oh, I don't know. 96 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,509 I'd say my Gomez is at least twice as pathetic as Ramon. 97 00:10:03,029 --> 00:10:06,389 Nonsense. Ramon is at least five times as pathetic as Gomez. 98 00:10:06,769 --> 00:10:08,779 Gomez is a hundred times. Two hundred. 99 00:10:09,019 --> 00:10:14,759 A thousand, two thousand, a million, a trillion, a zillion, infinity. Cute. 100 00:10:20,809 --> 00:10:25,740 I'm afraid Ramon's competitiveness is rubbing off on me. Oh, me too. 101 00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:27,980 This silly race has put us both on edge. 102 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:29,600 We should get them to call the whole thing off. 103 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:32,250 Yes, we should. After all, 104 00:10:32,250 --> 00:10:35,159 I'd hate to see Gomez embarrassed in front of the children. 105 00:10:36,879 --> 00:10:37,529 Embarrassed? 106 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:41,690 Come now, Morticia. We both know Ramon's going to win the race. 107 00:10:41,710 --> 00:10:45,509 Ramon beats Gomez at absolutely everything. 108 00:10:45,789 --> 00:10:49,600 The only reason Ramon wins everything is because Gomez feels sorry for him. 109 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:51,860 Why, my Gomez is twice the man Ramon is, 110 00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,720 and he's going to drive circles around your husband. 111 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:55,539 Oh, yeah? Yeah. 112 00:10:56,700 --> 00:10:57,179 Oh, yeah? 113 00:10:58,779 --> 00:10:59,000 Thank you. 114 00:11:24,509 --> 00:11:27,419 Wednesday, I thought we were going to play hunt and defenseless play. 115 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:29,259 In a minute, Pugsley. 116 00:11:29,919 --> 00:11:31,039 These are the rules. 117 00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:32,679 There are no rules. 118 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,330 You have 30 seconds. 119 00:11:41,799 --> 00:11:44,759 29, 28, nevermind. 27, 26, two, one. Ready or not, here we come. 120 00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:01,799 Leave your blazers on, Gomez. 121 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:03,450 Grind those gears. 122 00:12:04,529 --> 00:12:08,710 Slow down. Oh, the driving lesson's coming up. Splendid, Columbia. 123 00:12:08,730 --> 00:12:10,389 This is an excellent instructor. 124 00:12:10,649 --> 00:12:13,440 Attaboy, Gomez. Now it's time to try parallel parking. 125 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:20,240 We're making great progress, Morticia. 126 00:12:20,539 --> 00:12:24,740 I'll have Gomez zipping around blind curves in less than a month. Mister, 127 00:12:24,740 --> 00:12:26,210 the race is this afternoon. 128 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,639 Oh, in that case, whoops. 129 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:33,350 Goonies, we've got to get you behind the wheel of a real car. 130 00:12:33,850 --> 00:12:38,279 You're going to be from home, Joe, if it's the last thing you do. 131 00:12:49,019 --> 00:12:51,750 Well, old man, tell me everything I need to know about the car. 132 00:12:54,029 --> 00:12:57,990 I think I can remember that. Okay, Gomez, start her up. 133 00:12:59,090 --> 00:13:08,159 Gomez, that's the radio. Turn the key in the ignition. 134 00:13:13,490 --> 00:13:16,389 Ladies and gentlemen, you are about to witness history. 135 00:13:16,710 --> 00:13:21,919 Gomez Adams is about to conquer the automobile. I feel the need, the need for speed. 136 00:13:38,070 --> 00:13:43,580 He's doing better than I thought he would. He's driving. Go, Gomez, go! 137 00:13:43,820 --> 00:13:47,000 There's nothing ahead of you but miles of open road. 138 00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:49,179 And my chicken coop. 139 00:14:10,059 --> 00:14:14,139 Hopefully he's got to be around here somewhere. Don't worry, we'll find him. 140 00:14:14,750 --> 00:14:17,129 He still doesn't know the meaning of the word pain. 141 00:14:17,730 --> 00:14:19,529 He doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words. 142 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:30,870 It's tool time. 143 00:14:50,210 --> 00:14:56,629 Somebody drop something? Uh-oh. 144 00:14:58,909 --> 00:15:03,049 Go, ladies. Are you sure you're going to be all right? 145 00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:06,879 I'm fine, Skipper. Just tell Marianne and Ginger I put the coconuts in the lagoon. 146 00:15:08,669 --> 00:15:13,159 Gomez, it's me, Morticia. 147 00:15:13,279 --> 00:15:16,519 Fish, did you see me? 148 00:15:17,019 --> 00:15:19,309 I drove nearly a block, a personal best. 149 00:15:23,019 --> 00:15:24,559 Where did the walls go? 150 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,139 What are you talking about, darling? 151 00:15:26,159 --> 00:15:27,679 Tish, where are you? 152 00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:30,549 I'm right here, Gomez. 153 00:15:31,990 --> 00:15:34,629 Winning this race might be a little more complicated than I thought. 154 00:15:35,529 --> 00:15:37,009 I seem to have gone a little... Blind. 155 00:15:44,769 --> 00:15:47,309 So? He couldn't drive before. 156 00:15:56,389 --> 00:15:57,919 I can't let this stop me. 157 00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:02,519 The race must go on. But Gomez, you can't see. Can't eat it. 158 00:16:02,740 --> 00:16:06,929 My other four senses are so finely tuned, so heightened, that I don't meet my eyes. 159 00:16:08,730 --> 00:16:12,809 Excuse me, Lurch, old man. 160 00:16:21,299 --> 00:16:22,549 And that, my good family, 161 00:16:22,549 --> 00:16:25,549 is what would happen if my other senses weren't so finely tuned. 162 00:16:29,070 --> 00:16:32,120 Oh, Wednesday, I'm sorry. 163 00:16:32,139 --> 00:16:36,679 You're going up so fast. And those teeth are sharpening up nicely. 164 00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,779 Please, darling, you have nothing to prove. 165 00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:44,539 Everyone in this family knows you're the better man. 166 00:16:46,889 --> 00:16:48,009 Isn't that right, everyone? 167 00:16:51,889 --> 00:16:55,019 I appreciate your support, but this is something I have to do. 168 00:16:57,909 --> 00:16:59,039 Won't you reconsider? 169 00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:00,100 Oh, my. 170 00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:12,559 Gomez is going to need all the help he can get to win this race. 171 00:17:12,799 --> 00:17:17,579 Is everything ready? Oh, yes. I put air in the gas tank and filled the tires. 172 00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:22,089 And I prepared his last will and testament. That won't be necessary. 173 00:17:23,009 --> 00:17:25,670 Ramone Jones is never going to see me coming. 174 00:17:32,109 --> 00:17:35,569 Then again, I can't see where I'm going. 175 00:17:39,049 --> 00:17:40,720 What are we waiting for, Ramon? I don't want to 176 00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:42,430 just sit here all day. I've got a race to win. 177 00:17:43,579 --> 00:17:47,319 I'd be happy to start the race, Gomez, as soon as you get out of my car. 178 00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:49,420 Your car? 179 00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:57,230 Of course! Just using a little psychological warfare. Just playing some mind games. 180 00:17:59,150 --> 00:18:03,809 Just trying to break your concentration. And my foot. All part of the plan, Ramon. 181 00:18:03,829 --> 00:18:04,710 All part of... 182 00:18:12,150 --> 00:18:14,890 Gentlemen, start your engines. 183 00:18:19,319 --> 00:18:20,559 Right, start the car. 184 00:18:31,250 --> 00:18:32,900 I can feed you with my eyes closed. 185 00:18:33,660 --> 00:18:35,000 Of course, that would be redundant right now. 186 00:18:36,099 --> 00:18:37,440 You'll never win, Adam. 187 00:18:38,180 --> 00:18:39,309 What's that about my shins? 188 00:18:41,150 --> 00:18:43,609 I said you'll never win! Win, win! 189 00:18:44,309 --> 00:18:47,970 I'm sorry, old man! I can't hear you above 190 00:18:47,970 --> 00:18:51,000 the roar of my extremely powerful engines! 191 00:18:53,259 --> 00:18:56,559 Is father winning? Honestly, we're a Wednesday in London. 192 00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:57,759 Beats me. 193 00:19:03,819 --> 00:19:04,390 Ready! 194 00:19:31,019 --> 00:19:35,400 I think about it, and yeah, it makes sense. 195 00:19:57,079 --> 00:19:58,759 Who turned out the lights? 196 00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:01,259 I can see! I can see! 197 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:11,390 Congratulations, Ramon, you've won the race. What are you talking about? 198 00:20:11,430 --> 00:20:14,849 Gomez clearly hit the wall first. Ramon hit the ground first. 199 00:20:15,150 --> 00:20:17,940 Portiship, Eutressens, please, stop arguing. Yes, 200 00:20:17,940 --> 00:20:20,470 I think this race is to us both a valuable lesson. 201 00:20:21,309 --> 00:20:23,309 Yes, absolutely, old man. 202 00:20:23,930 --> 00:20:26,779 It's not whether you win or lose. It's how many balls you break. 203 00:20:26,940 --> 00:20:29,799 And the doctor said we both had the same exact number of fractures. 204 00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:31,839 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. 205 00:20:31,900 --> 00:20:35,099 First one in the conservatory and back is the better man. Ha, ha, ha.